(Tough) Love Month
Hey gym besties,
It’s been too long! I have to admit that the start of the year was EXTREMELY busy and I decided to skip the newsletter because my priority is always quality over quantity. I wanted to be able to take the the time to write you all something valuable rather than send a half-assed note just to get it out of the door (read: inbox). But we’re back! And I promise to keep up the consistency this year with monthly health & wellness tips.
I can’t believe it, but it’s already February. February happens to be my birth month so obviously it’s my favorite month of the year. But it’s also a great time because it’s the month of loveeee. In last year’s February newsletter, I wrote about heart health and ways to maintain cardiovascular wellness, which is key to overall wellbeing and longevity.
This year… I’m giving some TOUGH LOVE.
Look, I love you and I want you to love yourself. But I also know that February is the time where our new years resolutions start to feel shaky, we relax on our commitments to ourselves, the winter weather can bring us down. So I want to take this opportunity to be real with you about what’s keeping you stuck.
I’m not going to tell you “just stay motivated” or “you’ll feel like it eventually.” I’m going to tell you the truth — the kind that helps you stop starting over and finally build a healthier lifestyle that actually lasts.
If you want to feel better but keeps falling off, this newsletter is for you.
So. Welcome to the Tough Love Edition. Let’s get into it.
P.S. keep reading until the end for all the ways you can workout with me this month!
TOUGH LOVE TIP #1: Motivation isn’t coming. Discipline is the answer.
If you’re waiting until you feel motivated to work out, eat better, or take care of yourself… you’re going to be waiting forever.
Motivation is inconsistent. It’s a fleeting feeling that almost never shows up, and rarely stays when it does (like a bad partner).
For this reason, I often tell people to remove the word motivation from their vocabulary entirely.
Because we’re not actually motivated into action, we act our way into motivation. We show up consistently, we build discipline, and all of a sudden, we don’t need motivation to keep going because our plan is in place regardless.
Action step:
Stop asking “Do I feel like it today?”
Start asking “What would a healthy version of me do today?”
TOUGH LOVE TIP #2: Your body is not the problem, your habits are.
You don’t need to “fix your body” because your body is not broken, it’s responding to what you repeatedly do. We often mistake feeling sluggish, tired, and out of shape with the idea that we don’t have the energy to workout. The truth is, working out is what transforms those feelings into energy and positivity.
Action step:
Instead of focusing on weight loss, focus on lifestyle gain:
more energy
better sleep
better digestion
stronger muscles
improved mood
confidence in your body
Reframe to encourage habits that promote those feelings.
TOUGH LOVE TIP #3: If you keep quitting on yourself, you’re teaching yourself not to trust you.
Read that again. If you consistently bail on your own commitments, you’re building a relationship with yourself based on disappointment. Not only does that affect your confidence more than the number on the scale, it affects your ability to perform in all areas of life. One of the BEST things you can do for your overall success, is to use your health journey as a way to build trust with yourself and your body, and watch it spill over into all your relationships and work.
Action step:
Make smaller promises & focus on keeping them. (Remember that trust is built through follow-through.)
Start with: I will move my body 3 times this week, I will cook 2 meals this week, I will read 1 chapter this week. And then do it.
TOUGH LOVE TIP #4: Your nutrition doesn’t need to be perfect… but it does need to be honest.
Some of y’all are saying “I barely eat,” but your snacks are secretly a second dinner.
Some of y’all are saying “I don’t understand why I’m not losing weight,” but you’re drinking your calories every day.
Listen, I’m not saying we all can’t enjoy a cocktail. But if you’re not being real with yourself about how much you’re consuming, you’re never going to be able to make changes.
And chances are, once you understand your REAL diet, you’ll realize the changes don’t need to be drastic at all. If you drink 5 sodas a week, can you aim for 2-3? If you make a plate of pasta, can you add a vegetable?
Dieting doesn’t mean removing any source of joy on your plate, it means maximizing your meals for nutrition and enjoyment.
Action step:
Track your food for 3 days (not to limit yourself, to learn). And write down what you notice.
Awareness is power.
TOUGH LOVE TIP #5: If you’re always “starting over,” it’s because you keep choosing extremes.
This is one of the biggest reasons people struggle.
They go from no workouts to promising 6 days a week, eating out every day to no carbs or sugar, sleeping late to 5am workout girlie. And then what happens? They crash. Extreme routines foster extreme burnout. And the key to long-term health is SUSTAINABILITY.
If you find yourself repeating this cycle, it’s time to be honest about what makes sense for your routine – and build up slowly.
Action step:
Build a lifestyle that works even when you’re tired, busy, or stressed.
Identify your sustainability threshold (what is genuinely feasible for your schedule) and commit to practicing that for 1 month before adding anything new:
3 workouts/week
daily walks
protein + veggies most meals
water
sleep
boundaries
That’s the blueprint.
TOUGH LOVE TIP #6: No one is coming to save you.
I mean that with love. Your coach can guide you, your trainer can program you, your friends can support you, your family can encourage you. But at the end of the day, you are the one who has to choose yourself.
As cliche as it sounds, you are your biggest project. And you deserve the investment.
Action step:
Ask yourself this question:
“If I keep living like this, where will I be in 6 months?”
Then ask:
“What do I want instead?”
And take one step today.
